The Worst Man Speech

As mentioned in my previous post, I was in Italy for Idil and Axel's wedding. Nothing in the wedding was organized according to traditions - whatsoever.

So not surprisingly, there wasn't a Best Man for Axel; but I took the honour to be his Worst Man.

Here is my Worst Man speech upon his consent:

"About 18 Months ago, in the offices of the very same client I was providing my services to, a rather crazy looking guy started to appear. A foreigner; someone who wouldn't talk much but when he did, he did so loudly.

Soon through common friends we started to have occasional smoke breaks together. We would talk about stuff, discuss about intellectually enriching experiences such as women of South Africa or night life in Kazakhstan.

As much as he was open in the way he told about his experiences, he had a certain attitude of reservedness - something I at first attributed to his flaw of Scandinavian nature. But later on, I started to trace a familiar quality in his reservedness. And that feeling of familiarity might have led to a series of terrible consequences including our very existence here on this beautiful day.

The way I felt was that his reservedness was the kind that could only stem from a good and essentially innocent heart in an effort to protect itself from the evil world outside. In my humble observation though, at intelligent human beings, this kind of reservedness tends to usually couple with a strong and bitter sense of sarcasm which Axel interestingly doesn't have.

But as anyone else spending more than 10 minutes with him, you could realize why Axel didn't need to include any traces of sarcasm in his behaviour. Because his very existence in the universe is a sarcastic joke. He is sarcasm itself. Not bending concepts, phrases, meanings with irony but bending LIFE itself instead.

Luckily for our lives to bend, Axel likes' influence isn't necessary. In life's genes we have enough irony to feed countless life changing moments. At such a moment, I have decided to bring these two people together and still, even today, I'm surprised by this very decision, let alone its consequences.

OK - let's share some gossips:

At first, I mentioned about Axel to Idil. Upon her consent, I mentioned to Axel about this chick I have been knowing for such a long time. I showed him pictures of hers on Facebook and he said: "YEAH, IT WORKS FOR ME"

Axel, of course, didn't have a clue who he was talking about. I told him that her looks was just the start. Yes, she was very smart but what made her special was her misleadingly incurious, cheerful yet serious attitude towards life. I told him about the many cases at weddings where people were curious who that girl in her all the way cool dress dancing with all the grace was. Well - here we are at her wedding.

Anyway şekerler, they came together at Osman's birthday party for the first time in a dark little bar. I was with Idil when she first saw him from the distance. Axel was buying a drink probably knowing that he was being observed. Then those words spilled out of Idil's mouth: "HE LOOKS LIKE A BANDIT!".

Yes - Axel has tough face. Especially with his new titches on his forehead which he wants us to believe to be gained in heroic action where he saved a poor woman from some savage man - which - of course - we don't buy. Because it would be much more Axelish for him to get drunk in some shitty little bar in France to hit his head at the doorstep when leaving; right after to lose his laptop, wallet and not to mention his one shoe of course.

But yes, even without those titches that time, we agreed with Idil that he looked bit like Klaus Kinkski.

And all this talk gave me a chill for a moment. Because I was introducing a guy - a bandit like looking buy - to one of my best friends in this world, on the sole basis of my belief he had a good heart? I kept silent.

Today - after more than a year - I don't anymore believe that Axel has a good heart. Because I had the privilege to experience the means to know how warm, loving and welcoming he is.

A good friend of mine once said that she believed that everyone deserves a pair. Yes, I believe that too. But I further believe that everyone deserves a home.

So, what is home? Is it just an apartment? Is it a city? Is it a culture? Is it the perfect drag of smoke you have in bright sunlight on a cool day? Or is it a feeling of warmth fed by love we give to and receive from our families and friends that we carry everywhere?

I'd like to toast to these two beautiful people now. For literally creating a home for themselves, but also for making my home and each and every one of your homes and OUR HOME bigger, warmer and more colorful with their love.

Axel - welcome home, baby. And I know - by definition - I'm always welcome too. Because I'm your worst man.

I love you, guys."